An inquiry to ponder...

I posit this question to all:

If you had to live the rest of your life one way, which path would you choose?

1. All the furney, but no piece

2. 'The' piece, but no furney

The stipulations are as follows:

If you choose path one, you will lose your piece. It will be as if you never had one. Essentially, you will be castrated, even though you won't actually feel the process. The reward of choosing this option is that you will be loved by all the furney. Girls will want you really bad. They will buy you shit and let you go 'blah blah blah' into their pussies. You will be the envy of every man on earth. Well the at least the men who don't know you don't have a piece.

Path two invloves recieving a more than adequate piece. In fact, you will have quite a nice piece. Your piece will rival Peter North's piece. When it comes to size, longevity, and semen production, your piece will be supreme. However, there will be no furney. None whatsoever. Women will be repulsed by you. Not even a prostitute will take your money. I propose that rape should be available in this option. There are no cosmic forces preventing you from 'pushing up' on a girl, so I would say you could still rape on this option. If you do pick this option please indicate if the ability to rape had anything to do with your choice. (Editor's note: This is satire. Rape is never an option. And stay in school)

Personally I would have to choose the second option. What do you become if you have no piece? You become furney! I don't want to be furney, I'd rather perish. Moreover, if I had a piece that awesome I would never leave the house. I would give narcissist a new meaning, one that not even Lex Lugar could touch. I'm sure there have been some individuals throughout time who have fallen in love with their pieces. 90 percent of them probably lived in Greece.

Plus there is still sexual stimulation in forcing furney to stare at your piece in admiration. They might not be able to touch it, but nothing prevents them from creating clever metaphors about the girth and awesome power of your piece. Plus, have you guys ever heard of the bread and butter technique?

Nuff said...

(the word piece was used exactly 13 times) Is that bad luck for my piece? (14)

I look forward to hearing your responses